Resources & Scholarships for Single Parents Earning Their Master’s

Q: What challenges did you face as a single parent while pursuing your graduate degree, and how did you overcome them?

My first master’s program was hybrid, so a lot of work was done online. We would meet once a month on a Saturday. This was nice because I had small kids – by the time I was getting going in the program, I was pregnant, then she was a newborn – so it was nice not having to go to class all the time because I had small kids. When I did have to go to class, I’d have grandma watch them. I really learned to lean on my family to help me with watching the kids while I was in class or doing homework.

The next degree will be a bit trickier – it’s not online, so I’ll go to school Monday through Thursday all day. I think it’s going to be easier in some ways because the kids are older and more independent but also harder in a way because now they’re doing so many more things – we’re a bigtime sports family, for example. I can’t just be a “normal parent,” meaning I’m on the board for football and cheer and right now coaching my daughter’s softball team. I’ll need to figure out how to juggle all of this.

Q: Were there any resources, such as childcare or financial assistance, that you found particularly helpful in supporting you as a single parent in graduate school?

I was lucky enough during the first program to get a grant that paid for my degree — basically, there was an agreement in taking the grant that for every year of grant money I received, I’d do two years of service (working in the field or being a teacher). So taking advantage of that grant opportunity was extremely helpful. My teacher, who was basically the head of my department, connected her students with the grant opportunity as an incentive to get more qualified people out there working with kids. I wouldn’t have heard about it otherwise, so I consider myself so lucky.

What I’m trying to figure out is how to pay for the next degree. There’s another grant opportunity, but they only accept 10, and it’s extremely competitive. If I don’t get that grant, then I’ll have to go with student loans – though I haven’t had to use student loans yet.

Just a few days ago I was Googling scholarships for single parents; I’ll take whatever help I can get! I also plan to call the financial aid office to see if they know of other grants or opportunities. You just never know until you ask.

Q: How did you balance the demands of parenting and graduate school, and what strategies did you find most helpful?

It’s all about time management. I’m pretty crazy with my calendar – I put everything in my calendar, from work stuff to kids’ appointments to kids’ sports schedules, and I line out when assignments and tests are due. Being organized and prepared is so important. You have to be able to look ahead and go, “Oh, that assignment is due Wednesday, and Monday and Tuesday at work are crazy, so I’ll need to do it this weekend.” And this is not something I was great at when I was younger or during my bachelor’s degree, when I’d usually wait until the last minute. It’s definitely a skill that takes time to develop.

This speech program coming up is intense – we’re enrolled in 15 credits during the first semester, when usually nine credits is considered full time for a master’s program – so they have us working hard. I’m going to need to manage my time better than ever!

I honestly think students with kids have an advantage when it comes to time management. You tend to make the most out of what time you have, because you know you’re not going to get any more – like if you have one hour available, you’re going to cram what you can into it!

Q: Did you find it difficult to network and build relationships with other graduate students as a single parent, and how did you address any potential barriers?

I would say it’s a little more difficult to network, especially when your coursework is hybrid or online. You’re just not in class all the time, which is usually where you form relationships with other students and your professors. But the community for my program is small, and a lot of people I work with have gone through the same program, so I ended up knowing people anyway because it’s such a small world. But specific to being a single parent, when the other students were getting together to study at Starbucks, I couldn’t do that. I was already spending enough time away from my kids, so I didn’t take advantage of that kind of group time. That just meant I had to work extra hard to make those connections when we did get together.

I did meet people and form relationships, but it’s just more difficult. You have to really be proactive.

Q: How did being a single parent impact your relationship with the faculty during graduate school?

I had my daughter, my third child, just one or two weeks before one of my semesters was scheduled to start. In the fall semester when I was pregnant, I knew I wanted to take a research class the following spring, but I didn’t know the professor – and he was a male, which was relatively unusual for this field. So, I met with him in the fall semester and I told him I wanted to take the class, but I’m pregnant and going to have this baby at some point. I just asked if he could be flexible with me, and he joked in response: “You better not have that baby in my class!” But then he told me it was cool, and thanks for talking with him, definitely take the class, and that he’d work with me. I ended up having her early, so I let him know (and told him I didn’t want to leave my newborn with anyone else). He told me to bring her. So the first day of class, she’s in a stroller, he’s doing roll call and gets to my name, and then he looked up and said, “It looks like you brought another student with you!” He was so cool with it.

As a parent, I found that I was really able to connect with my teachers – and a lot was actually because of my kids, now that I’m thinking about it. They were all so cool. I don’t know if that goes for all fields – but definitely for my field. A good recommendation for most things in life is to be honest and upfront. Communicate with them about your situation, and they may just be flexible.

Q: What strategies did you use to maintain your mental and emotional well-being while balancing the demands of parenting and graduate school?

Yeah, focusing on my mental health – that’s probably something I could have improved upon! I think it still goes back to that time management piece — not getting backed up and pacing yourself. But self-care, I could do better. My kids get everything they need — they totally come first. But there are things like the fact that I need sleep as I’m getting older, and I can’t function on five hours anymore, so I need to plan things accordingly so I won’t be up until 3 a.m. studying or writing. I do think self-care also involves doing the stuff we like – I make time for my kids to do sports and their things, for example, and that’s fun for me, too. It’s about balance – you can’t just focus on school; it has to be little bit of this and a little of that.

Q: What advice would you give to a single parent who is hesitant to pursue a graduate degree because they are worried about the impact on their children?

I think a lot of single parents are afraid they can’t do it. They come in with this mindset, “I just can’t do it – I have kids.” But I say, just go for it. If this is something you want to do, do it. Lean on the support systems you have – whether that’s friends or family. Take time to develop time management and organizational skills. And keep in mind: Grad school doesn’t last forever. It might be a few hard years, but in the end, you’ll have your degree, and your kids will be so proud. Maybe you’ll get a better job. And you can say, after all that hard work, you really did it.